A Wedding is a joyful time not a job – how to have a stress free weddingAnnalisa Mongio'Jul 27, 2016Travelling to Italy as I write this, I imagine couples in the airport on their way to Rome or Venice or wherever their dream place is, to celebrate the most important day of their lives.How excited and nervous they must be. Knowing that on the way back things will be different at least in a way they will be able to say: “I am a married person now”.…Excited and terrified!Etsy.comDuring my experience organising weddings, I noticed that so many couples spend their time getting anxious and stressed over the planning even when they know they have a wedding planner that looks after most of the event for them. I found this a shame as they really miss the whole point of their wedding day. It’s not about the fancy dress in which to look a million dollars, it’s not about the best reception or the coolest guests to invite and impress. I have seen too many couples organize their wedding to impress others rather than to enjoy themselves.You wedding day should be a beautiful moment in which you finally unify your life with your partner, celebrating your love for each-other in-front of all of your family and friends. It is about celebrating the joining of two lives, the day where two people truly become one. How beautiful is that? Yet, too many people miss this.Photo: Enzo Campitelli So my advice is, relax, enjoy this short journey to the day of the wedding. It doesn’t matter if it’s not going to be perfect, the people you invite are there because they are happy for you and your partner, if they really love you they will laugh with you at the mistakes that will happen during the day. Because I promise you, no matter how meticulous you are in planning your day, there will always be something that will go wrong.. so what? Isn’t this what life is all about? Isn’t life beautiful because of, and not in spite of, its imperfections? And how boring would it be if everything always went according to plan?We have interviewed a counsellor Mairead Holsgrove, who shared with a few tips on how to handle stress and the mistakes to avoid:1: Delegate, delegate, delegate!Photo: Enzo CampitelliOne of the main reasons that couples stress themselves out leading up to their weddings is because they’ve taken on too much. They want to do everything themselves without asking for anyone’s help. This can be a recipe for disaster!Learn to let go and leave some of the wedding planning to friends and family, or even more sensibly, hire a wedding planner!You will still have the final say on every decision so there’s no need to worry that your wedding won’t be special and unique!2.Stay Organised!ebay.comWhether you’re planning everything yourself, or enlisting the help of a wedding planner, it’s important to make sure that everything is prepared before the big day comes around, don’t leave everything until the last minute! This will only make you more anxious.One good way to keep everything in order is to keep a wedding diary, you can find in any stationery shop.You should also be careful to book everything well in advance, especially if you are getting married in a particularly busy time of the year or in a particularly popular wedding destination.3.Walk away from negative people.Forbes.comYou love your family and friends of course but try to avoid “certain people” too close to you. I know this can be tricky especially if “those people” are your mother in law or someone close to you.Try for instance to have a “conspiracy partner” who can be your sister or best friend so that can help you ” distance” that particular person without hurting her or him.Anxiety is horrible for your stress level so with the excuse of wanting him/her to fully relax for your wedding day, try to “push” him/her away from the planning. Your “conspiracy partner” can help you with this. Be firm on this!4.Communicate with guests and suppliers!moposa.comCommunication is vital when it comes to your big day, especially if you are hosting your wedding in Italy. Make sure that all your guests are 100% sure of all the dates and have clear directions to the hotel and venue. You should also make sure they are clear on the schedule for the wedding day itself. You don’t want your wedding to be ruined because half your guests booked their flights for the wrong day!Of course it’s also important to communicate constantly with everyone who is involved with the wedding (photographers, caterers, wedding planner etc.) to make sure that everything runs as smoothly as possible on the big day. You really need to prepare a timetable for everyone and always check, double check and treble check. Keep touching base with everyone.One of the many mistakes that couples make is that they don’t often openly say exactly what they expect or want from a supplier and often end up being disappointed by the result.5.Plan some fun activities!By the time the wedding day finally rolls around, you will well and truly be in need of some fun to distract you from all your last minute worries. Why not plan some activities for you and your guests to enjoy together? You can find some great ideas for activities to do with you guests in this previous article. In Italy there is so much to do any place you pick. Make most of it.6.Take good care of yourself101fitness.co,nzIt’s important to feel your best on your wedding day, so make sure to get regular exercise, eat healthily, and avoid overindulging on alcohol leading up to and during your wedding. Check out our past article on pre wedding work out routines for some great tips on keeping fit!Exercise is also an excellent way to relieve stress! So you’ll be killing two birds with one stone!Stress is definitely not good for you as couple, it leads to arguments and misunderstandings, you don’t want to end up fighting on your wedding day! So try to do these things together , it will strengthen your relationship and make you more relaxed. You can find a lot of inspirational workouts for couples on the web.7. Breath!vindicarlo.ukWe often forget about the vital importance of breathing, after all, we do it all day long without giving it a second thought!Practicing relaxing breathing techniques has been proven to be a highly effective stress reliever. You can find some tips on how to relax through breathinghere. With breathing comes meditation. You can do it alone or preferably with your partner. It will help you both to relax.8. Get a good nights resthellomagazine.comIn today’s rushed and always “on” world, it’s sometimes difficult to get the right amount of sleep. We are all constantly checking our phones and laptops, and regularly exposing ourselves to the light emitted by these devices right before we go to sleep for the night. So ditch your smartphone at least an hour before you go to bed and curl up with a good book if you want to have a relaxing night’s sleep!If you are having difficulty falling asleep, try an app like mySleepButton, which is designed to help you drift off by focusing your mind on different ideas to stop you from tossing and turning endlessly. This will be especially useful if wedding worries are keeping you awake.9. Practice Mindfulnesslaurazick.com“Mindfulness”, or the practice of increasing our awareness of what we are doing in any particular moment, has become increasingly popular over the last couple of years. Many people find that it helps to reduce stress and increase overall well-being, so why not give it a shot! You can find out more about Mindfulnesshere. You worry because you think of the future. This will defiantly help you training your brain to think as now.10. Just Enjoy Yourself!Photo: Cristiano OstinelliWeddings can be very stressful, but at the end of the day, you want to look back at your wedding day and remember how much you enjoyed it, not all the minute little things that didn’t go according to plan. So, when something goes wrong, take a deep breath and just relax! Try to see the funny side of any wedding mishaps that crop up, and try not to treat everything wedding related as a life or death situation, the world will still keep turning even if your flowers aren’t exactly the right shade of pink! Always remember , your stress will have an effect on other people like your guests who will feel it too. The most enjoyable wedding I have ever been to as a guest, are the oncs where couples just relaxed and enjoyed the day. If you do that EVERYONE ELSE WILL ENJOY IT TOO! If you have any more tips to share on the matter or any advice you may want or have, let me know.